cry baby

"Where the heck is my bottle, people!?"

"That's better. My old friend, the bottle."

chillin' papa style

Liz informed Jonathan that pizza might not be the best starter food. Schuyler agrees.

Chillin' with her Papa at Kim and Ward's.

where's my handbag

Schuyler test drives her dress shoes.

driving around the crack house lookin' for trouble

a new gate is on order... it'll just take a while. In the meantime, we have to cope with crack house gate we inherited from the previous owners who presumably have shares in the pharma group that makes Tetnus vaccines.

Schuyler takes corners well. Note Dad's busted toe. Beware Schuyler, you have his toes - they are constantly getting into trouble. If he'd had normal sized toes, the weight would have missed him.

maybe just one

So in keeping with our familial habit of having all medical issues arrive at the same time, Lucy was sent to Boston unexpectedly to have some tests run. Fortunately, it was all a false alarm! Unfortunately, it meant that Schuyler's hobble-toed Dad was left to care for both Schuyler and Trystan. Her Dad learned many things that day: (1) Lucy does not have an easy job (2) looking after two is not actually as hard as he thought (3) other babies are different (4) feeding them both is easier than he thought (5) as cool a kid as Trystan is, he was very, very happy when Jake arrived to pick him up and (6) although it was easier than he thought, maybe one is enough.

watch your toes

So i pulled Schuyler out of the car only to find that she had either (a) been in a secret 15 round boxing match in the back seat or (b) learned how to pick her nose and needs her nails trimmed. And to keep with the bloody talk, her Dad managed to drop a 35 lb weight on his big toe. In case you have ever wondered "what would happen if i slipped and dropped this weight on my toe?" I can tell you that the toe will indeed break and also bleed a surprising amount and you will hobble around for a lot longer than you would imagine.

where is...

Who needs expensive toys? One of Schuyler's relentlessly enjoyable games is definitely "where is...?" (known on the mainland as "peekaboo"). She'll play "where's Schuyler?" and hide herself and "Where's Mummy?" by hiding Mummy. Mummy and Daddy like to play games like "where is... all our free time?" and "where is... all our money?"

hunter gatherer

I used to not believe that there were any differences between men and women. That was before I lived with a very kind and patient woman who gently instructed me that I had far too few pillows, too few soaps, too few shoes and also too many guitars, photos of musicians, and useless paper. I also learned that hearing is different from listening. That kind woman gave birth to a beautiful little girl who taught me that this little girl likes to gather. With the aid of her crocodile cart, she collects various objects (remote controls, burp cloths, books, phones, dishtowels, dog toys) on her cart and then drives them around the room, presumably looking for a checkout counter. On the other hand, the similar aged boy babies taught me that boys like to break stuff, run around with 100% energy and 0% knowledge of what there are going to do next. I'm starting to understand why women think we men are dumb.

Little Dresses - Part 2

Liz has been waiting for the day when Schuyler will toddler enough to withstand a little dress and the day is finally here. Although she only walks six steps or so before gravity takes over, she seems to try a lot harder in a dress. In this scene, our hero is trapped outside after a perfunctory bath while Schuyler taunts him by both being inside where the action is and also getting the better part of the Big People's attention. Sorry, Magic... how about we buy your love back with treats and bones?

little dresses - part 1